Ignoring Sideshow Distractions

God has created each of us uniquely!  We all have different ways of learning and growing intellectually and spiritually.  I love the uniqueness and creativity of the human race.  I love how God is intimate and personal with each of one of His kids and how He cultivates our hearts and minds based on how He personally designed, fashioned, and formed us!  In other words, God created us and therefore knows exactly how to teach us!

There are 7 learning styles that have been scientifically determined.  My learning style Major, is  "Intrapersonal."  This simply means that I'm private, introspective, independent, and I love to spend time on self-analysis.  In other words, I know my mind!  My Minor learning style, however, is "Kinesthetic" which basically means I learn things by using my body and sense of touch to learn about the world around me.  I'm a hands on kind of person.  My major and my minor are split nearly equally which I absolutely love, because putting those two learning styles together means I have to prove what I learn intellectually, with an experience physically!  Which brings me to share my latest blog, "Ignoring Sideshow Distractions."  So here we go....

I love to read the Bible especially when God gives me an experience to light the truth of what I've read.   Proverbs 4:25 [MSG] says...Keep your eyes straight ahead; ignore all sideshow distractions.


"Focus on what's ahead?"



Everyone knows what it means to focus, or look forward, or straight ahead, etc., but how do we really focus when we find ourselves in the midst of life circumstances that are screaming at us?  How do we silence those circumstances and stay focused on what's ahead?  It's not an easy task, let me tell you!  It's more difficult than anyone may lead you to believe.  Oh, it sure is easy to tell someone else to "focus on what's ahead," but when you yourself are in the midst of the chaos, its more difficult to overcome your obstacles with that less than authentic answer.  Just keepin' it real peeps!  At 41 years old, I think I've finally found the answer - at least for me.  Somehow I'm led to believe that this is also an answer for many others.  Let me share my experience with you that led me to my answer, and possibly yours!

I have wanted to go ziplining for what seems like, forever!  Well, that's exactly what my daughter and I did together the day after Thanksgiving this year.  Ok, I have to say, I thought this was going to be just climbing up to various platforms to zip down a cable and enjoy a rocket fast experience!  Ha!  Was I wrong!!!  To get to the fun, rocket fast, experience, I had to overcome a plethora of obstacles, at some points fifty feet above the ground, just being tethered to a cable!  I mean there were moving planks, hanging posts with little foot pegs that had to be navigated, there was even a place where you walked across the cable and had these little ropes to grab here and there to get you across.  You want to talk about physical!  HOLY SMOKES BATMAN!  I used muscles in my body that I didn't even know existed anymore.  LOL!  There were times I wanted to quit because it was so taxing on my body.  There were moments I was hanging on for dear life and praying to get my "ass across the falls" you could say!  There were times I had to literally place my attention so deeply on a "focus" point (mainly my guides eyes as he coached me through a series of obstacles).  Yep, I needed a coach at times to get through this course and also a solid decision of refusing to quit and to finish this thing!!!   

To get through these obstacles, I came to a point of having to choose.  If I was gonna make it, I had to make a choice that I was gonna make it!  I had to shut out the background noise of screaming kids that were also completing this adventure.  I had to stop looking at how high up I was and how far the ground was below me.  There were points in this journey that I had to take a brief rest on some of the platforms built in the trees to regain my focus.  In the midst of the obstacle, my passion and purpose to finish, had to be greater than any sideshow distraction!  Did you get that?  Let me say that again...."in the midst of the obstacle, my passion and purpose to finish, had to be greater than any sideshow distraction!"  God showed me this incredible truth through my adventure!  

As I reflect upon the book "Love Does" by Bob Goff, which I read prior to my ziplining adventure, I'm drawn to an excerpt:  "Jesus doesn't invite us on a business trip. Instead, He says let's go after those things that inspire and challenge you and let's experience them together. You don't need a lot of details or luggage or equipment, just a willingness to go into a storm with a Father who's kicking footholds into the steep sides of our problems while we kick a couple in ourselves too. He guides us into those footholds with His strong hands while we're safely tethered to Him by a bright red rope of grace, which holds us securely. Somehow in all of this, the terrain we navigate doesn't seem as scary either, because when we're on an adventure with God we're too excited to be afraid and too engaged to be thinking of anything else."

There are a lot of sideshow distractions that enter our story called life!  The question is, will you allow the distractions to consume you; to ultimately get you off track and off of your mission that God designed for you to accomplish, while your here for this brief time?  You must follow what your passionate about and then attach purpose, God's purpose, to your passion!  People don't question what they are passionate about!  They know these things!  The questions come when you attach purpose to what your passionate about!  There is great purpose within you!  You will find that great purpose when you decide to live full out of the passion that is resonating deep within you.  Maybe there are a ton of things you are doing that have nothing to do with your passion!  Begin to evaluate those areas and then determine if it is a sideshow distraction!  Sideshow distractions will keep you from two things:

A. - They will keep you from being fulfilled! 

B. - They will keep you from fulfilling that which you've been designed to accomplish! 

We were all created with passion and we were all created with a purpose to accompany that passion.  Your purpose is for others.  What sideshow distractions do you need to eliminate or eradicate?  What voices do you need to shut up and in some cases shut out?  It's time!  It's your time, if you choose for it to be! 

Tethered To Him,

TDahl

   

The Shift

Sometimes things in life just don't make sense.  Your mind and heart are in serious disconnect and you can't figure out why.  You pray, and seek, and pray, and seek...and nothing, nothing, brings clarity to this internal chaos brewing inside of you.  I think one's first response is to try and find the external source causing the disruption - after all it has to be something external - right?!  However, when you begin to turn inward - listen to your heart, silence your mind, you will soon find clarity.  Most of us try to ignore the discontent beneath our skin, because it appears easier to just cast it off, and take on the attitude of "this too shall pass."  You go about your life until something happens or someone says or does something that jerks you quickly back to the reality of this internal friction you've become so great at ignoring. 

So here's my story...

My shift began a little over 2 years ago.  I can't tell you what started it - not that I don't know, but its just something deeply personal.  One day I'll be able to talk about it, but right now its too emotionally raw for me.  I will say that there are only a handful of people that know all of the details because I've needed to have a venting place to express my heart and my mind and I've also needed solid people that were detached completely from the issues, that know me intimately, to help bring my heart to Jesus, helping me to keep a healthy perspective.  I can say that during this season, as time went on my heart went numb.  I was just going through the motions of showing up to life every day.  I questioned myself over and over again.  I tried calling things that were not as though they were-hoping to see evidence of something different.  I even came to a point where I just wanted to shut down and stop everything.  It was during this time in 2010 that I had decided to go on a mission trip to Haiti.  I was following the best advice I've ever gotten - "when you're down and out, go serve someone in a worse state than yourself!"  

As the wheels of the plane touched down in Haiti, my heart had not even been remotely prepared for what my eyes were about to see.  As we exited the airport, I was riding in the back seat of a truck, looking out the window as I saw my first "Tent City."  It took my breath away - in a not good way!  Tears began to well up in my eyes, and big crocodile tears began to roll down each cheek.  My week in Haiti put a longing in my heart.  A longing to serve on a grander scale; a longing to build relationship with those who are like minded; and sing like I've never sung before!  You may ask what does singing have to do with it?  Well, kinda everything!  That is what my heart has longed to do since I could say "Mama" and that is the very thing that the enemy of my soul has tried to rob from me!  

When I came back from Haiti I was a different person.  I dove into music like never before!   I recorded a debut worship album in Nashville, TN in March 2011 with a 7K investment from my Mom - because after all, when you tell someone you're a singer, you need a calling card!  Then another thing happened.  A friend of mine, Sam Francart, decided she was going to do the "World Race."  This is a year long mission trip which is incredibly intense. It's literally like 12 countries in 12 months.  So, I talked with some friends of mine who are musicians and singers and said, "hey how about we do a "Night of Worship" for Sam's mission trip?  They loved the idea and well, that's exactly what we did!  As a team, we had the best time together.  The Night of Worship was amazing! We created a life memory that weekend in March 2012, and one day when we're old and gray rocking on our rocking chairs, instead of rocking worship venues from a stage, whether were together or apart, we'll still laugh when we recall our time together that weekend! 

The "Night of Worship" we did that weekend, birthed a desire in us to do this all the time!  So, guess what, that's exactly what we did!   In May of this year, I was having a small picnic lunch with a few friends and one of my friends said, "hey you need to do more worship nights" (those same friends had traveled all the way down to Palm Beach from Eustis to attend the event).  I wanted to do that a few years back, but it never came to fruition.  Anyway, I agreed with them and "Supernatural Saturday" was born in my heart that day!  So I put a Facebook Status out there letting people know we needed a venue for a monthly "Night of Worship."  Within 5 minutes I had a message from an Elder from The Church at Whistling Pines in Umatilla.  We had the meeting the end of May and started "Supernatural Saturday" in July and we're still going!  If you ever want to come - its' the last Saturday of every month at 6:30 PM.  Visit my website at www.tammydahl.com for info! 

In August, my best friend Sameer, sent me an email telling me to go get the book "Love Does" by Bob Goff and he said, get it today!  It just so happened that I was passing by a Books-A-Million on my way back from a meeting in Orlando.  I swung in, purchased the book, and basically couldn't get my face out of it - and still can't!  Now listen, I read A LOT!!!  I love books!  Another benefit I have received from my best friend is that he always encouraged me to read, read, read!  I loved books as a child but somehow got away from reading until he came into my life nearly 15 years ago.  As a woman, its usually shoes or clothes that are our weakness, well, I can tell you, books are mine!  I want a huge library in my home one day, not in my garage (as it is now)!  I want a library, fully equipped with a rolling ladder!  On a side note, I realize there are a lot of people into those e-books, but to me there is nothing like having a book in your hands in which you can highlight quotes, scribble in the margins, earmark the pages, etc., because nothing compares!! 

As I read the pages of "Love Does" it was as if someone wrote my heart on those pages!  He said things, I'd only thought!  The entire book resonated in my heart and set my heart ablaze!  Forget a little spark people, this was a fire!!  It was as if someone took a tank of gas and doused the small burning embers of my heart!  This fire lit up my heart, my mind, my senses, and ultimately my entire world!  I saw things clearly!  I took a few months away from everything and everyone to get my heart and mind on the same page and then upon my re-engagement I gave my church my thirty day notice of my departure!  Yes, I left my church!  I sought out Pastor's Ted and Marie Morgan and asked them to be my covering because I needed to have leadership I could bounce things off of, and cover me in prayer, and support me!  I'm called to the world - a world full of hurting people!  I'm called to get my "skin in the game" of life, and to love in action!  I'm called to serve others!  You may find me in a church, or you may find me in a bar - loving people!  My agenda is simply to love!  

I've found my childlike faith again!  When I was a little girl, my favorite song was "Here Am I Lord, Send Me."  I would sing it in the shower, and on my way to school, and on my way home from school, in the valley riding my horse (I liked how it sounded in the valley - it resounded with an echo), and basically everywhere else!  As I grew older, the song was silenced, and in life I settled for a schedule instead of an adventure.  My heart has found that place of adventure again and I sing "Here am I Lord, send me." 

When you're a child, people's hearts are touched by you when all you want to do is serve Jesus.  However, when you're a grown up, and you're playing with the big kids on the playground, or what I refer to as bullies, there is a painful side to following Jesus - I'm not gonna lie!  Unfortunately its also people!  People with their big opinions, fork tongues, and false accusations...all in the name of Jesus, don't you know!  That's a whole other blog that one day...I will write!  However, I know from experience that the best way to silence your critics is to ignore the commentary!  If people want to assume the worst, then let them assume!  God knows my heart and frankly, that is all that matters!  Jesus went about the Father's business and boy, He sure had His critics!  Well, I've got mine and it's ok!  I may not be a cute little kid anymore in the eyes of people, but my heart is like that of a child, filled with faith and hope and LOVE!  I'm holding Jesus' hand and saying "Let's go" instead of asking "Where are we going?"  Who cares!  I'm with Jesus, so where ever we go is fine with me! 

I'll close with the lyrics to a song I used to sing often as a child.  Then, I didn't comprehend all that I do now...but it is refreshing to know I'm hand in hand with the one I asked to take my hand at the tender age of 7. 

My Father Planned It All

  

What tho' the way be lonely

And dark the shadows fall;

I know where'er it leadeth,

My Father planned it all.

There may be sunshine tomorrow,

Shadows may break and flee;

'Twill be the way He chooses,

The Father's plan for me.

He guides my falt'ring footsteps

Along the weary way,

For well He knows the pathway

Will lead to endless day.

A day of light and gladness

On which no shade will fall;

'Tis this at last awaits me -

My Father planned it all.

Chorus

I sing thru the shade and the sunshine,

I'll trust Him whatever befall;

I sing for I cannot be silent -

My Father planned it all.

P.S.  An addition to my "Caper", my best friend Sameer and I are having lunch/dinner with Bob Goff in February!  I get to connect with the man who penned his heart on the pages of "Love Does!"  Isn't that just like God giving His children above and beyond what they ever thought possible!

Living the Adventure,

TDahl

  

Sharing The Playground

This is a follow up to Jesus on Your Playground...

I've titled this blog "Sharing THE Playground."  Notice there is a significant difference in the word YOUR and THE.  I wanted to bring this to your attention first thing because YOUR playground is YOUR playground!  Your playground, as I previously mentioned, will not look like anyone else's playground.  Why?  Because there is NO ONE like you!  Even when someone operates in what appears to be the same gifting and talents you may possess, they are not you, and you are not them!  I'm attempting to drive that so deeply into your mind, that you never forget!!  

Years ago - 1999 to be exact, I was trying to be someone other than myself to attract someone I was interested in at the time.  God spoke to me clearly and directly and this is basically what He said...."Tammy, you rob yourself and others of the gift of you, when you're trying to be someone else.  I've created you and fashioned you with a purpose.  The way I've put you together, needs to be lived authentically, for you to touch those I've called you to touch, and develop the relationships I've planned for you to develop, and to make the impact I've called you to make!"  It hit me so hard when God spoke that to my heart!  It's also then, that I made a conscious decision to live authentically, no matter what! 

So lets talk about "THE" playground.  Erica had made a reference to something by a comment she made  (see Jesus on Your Playground) that was so true.  She said "Too often we get caught up in "Who is the greatest among us" and miss that Jesus is playing with the kids."  Now one thing I know, from raising a child myself, is that kids are usually selfish by nature, but especially when they are playing with others.  There are a few kids that have this supernatural gift of selflessness, but I have not seen many!  Parent's are constantly trying to teach their kids to share their toys, or let someone else have a turn crossing the monkey bars, etc.  You get my point, even if you don't have children!  Just observing them tells you everything you need to know.  I'm thinking back on how every Summer my daughter would go to her godparent's home for a few weeks.  Being a single mom for well, basically the whole time of raising my daughter, I tried very hard to surround her with a healthy traditional family environment (mom, dad, kids, etc.) so she could be in the mix of how one operates.  Well, her godparents have 4 kids and well, my daughter is an only child so for the first few days Mikayla would be struggling to be the center of attention because that's what she was used to at home, being an only child! It was quite interesting actually to watch a child fight for attention using all kinds of tactics.  I'm laughing just thinking of that!  What's not funny, is when we as adult "kids" of Father God, still wrestle with that "center of attention" complex and use all sorts of tactics that in the end hurt others, deeply!  

I for one, do not want to ever hurt anyone, but the fact is, I do, I will, and probably will again, several more times as long as I'm alive!  It's called "not being perfect!"  I do however like to share "THE" playground.  I've always been for the "underdog" for lack of a better term.  I've found at times that kicks me in teeth, but the bottom line is, I want people to integrate "their" playground into "my" playground and see THE playground!!  My heart for building community has been developed over the years.  It started when I was a little girl.  As a child, I was part of a church that was very judgmental.  In fact, if you did something wrong, you were used as the "example" from the pulpit of what not to do.  Even if you weren't used as the example, you were shunned by the "leadership" if you weren't living up to their expectations.  I saw many people walk away from God, leave the church building, and ultimately leave community!!  It hit my life like an arrow as well, because we were one of those families that walked away!  That's why now, when I see a family or someone leave a "church" family I run after them!  In my previous 2 churches, when people left, I literally looked them up, one by one, and went after them!  No one knew I did that!  I didn't advertise it all over the place.  You may ask, why did I do that?  The answer is simply because I wanted to be sure they had community!!  Listen, I don't care when someone chooses a different church home, I just want to know they are building community with others and not isolating!  Jesus left the flock to go after the one!  It is imperative we are part of community!  Being part of community does present its challenges because there are times when "I" gets in the way of "We."  There is a "Who is the greatest among us" complex and we miss that Jesus is playing with the kids, as Erica shared.  "We" is always more powerful than "I." 

We need live in the awareness that Jesus playing on our playground is personal, and intimate, and reserved for us as an individual!  We also need to live in the awareness that Jesus is playing with the other kids on their playgrounds and it will look different, and be different, and is personal and intimate to them!  We need to live without comparing the playgrounds!!!  There is absolutely no comparison!!!  We also need to live with the awareness that just because someone elses playground looks different from ours, doesn't justify selfishness!  We then need to integrate our playgrounds and play together - giving and receiving from each other!  There is so much we have to offer each other as brothers and sisters in Christ!!  Look, if God didn't create another fingerprint like mine, and He didn't create another fingerprint like yours, don't you think He wants us to share with each other to get the full benefit of Him?  We are the body of Christ!!  Some of us are hands, some of us are arms, some of us are legs, some of us are feet, some of us are mouths, etc.!  We are all moving parts of ONE body, yet each part is important for the other to function.  I'm reminded of the scripture that says where one can put a thousand to flight, two can put ten thousand!  I don't know about you, but I'm ready for authentic multiplication in the body of Christ!  

Let's play nice!  Let's appreciate what each other have to offer!  Let's look at the power of multiplication!  The harvest is ripe, but the laborers are few!  Lets link arms and break down the ministry walls that tend to separate, and co-labor together to integrate!!  

See you on THE playground!

TDahl 

Jesus on Your Playground

So yesterday, I'm having this conversation via a Facebook status I posted, and my friend Erica responded with something that revolutionized my world in the blink of an eye.  You know how you can hear a message that someone preaches, or listen to a teaching of some kind, and what you're taking in, is good stuff, but then after a few hours your emotions settle and you go about your daily life?  You know what I'm talking about!!  Then there are other times that someone says something or writes something and your heart explodes and you know like you know, something just happened that would literally make a change in you and the way you view something!  Well, I had that moment I just described, yesterday - 11.28.2012! 

Here is the feed...

Erica Amalfitano:  Tammy the answer to where do you go to church is...I am the church. I'm in it everyday, all day long! You are about the Father's business! Community--people, not isolating yourself to one group, but giving and loving everyone. I'd say you hold church pretty well yourself!


Tammy Dahl:   That is so incredibly true Erica! You know what's super funny?  Darin saw this in me years ago! LOL LOL LOL!! He would be proud!!!! :-)

Erica Amalfitano:  I am a little "Darin" disciple. LOL!!! Actually He saw in me, a heart that sees the bigger picture. Too often we get caught up in "Who is the greatest among us" and miss that Jesus is playing with the kids.

Tammy Dahl:   LOL!!! I love him and I so love you!!!! :-) Right!!! I love love love that analogy....Jesus is playing with the kids! I feel so alive.....

Erica Amalfitano:   Keep dreaming, keep loving, keep believing for what you do not see!

Erica Amalfitano:  You are in a great place.

Tammy Dahl:   I just got a huge revelation Erica....everytime we use our gifts and talents for God, and follow the desires of our hearts....it's really Jesus, playing on our playground with us. The playground changes as we grow older, but its still "our" playground!!! We were meant to enjoy our gifts and talents, and use them to expand the Kingdom! WOW WOW WOW....Jesus is on the playground with me!! I'm balling my face off right now....LOL LOL LOL!!!

Erica Amalfitano:   He LOVES being with us and He LOVES when we truly operate in what He gave us. People have too small of sight. It's unfortunate that we do not like to see others enjoying God because we are envious that its not happening with us.

As that revelation in my heart exploded, God gave me something I never really identified with via experience.  I obviously had a head knowledge, but experiencially I couldn't really identify!  That something was a father on the playground with his kids.  I never had that!  I never had a father who was really actively involved in my life.  When Erica said that, my heart came alive in an instant!  My head knowledge, immediately became heart knowledge!  I began to think back and remember specific moments of my life that mean so much to me.  Moments when I was a little girl, running outside every morning at around this time (5:00 AM), riding my pony (that was my playground).  Moments that I went to gymnastics class and through practice, mastered my round off, double back hand spring, and my cartwheel on the balance beam.  The moment at my track meet when I jumped the gun because I was so excited that my mom could be there.  The time I delivered a flawless performance, singing "Memory" from Cats (that people still talk about - and it was 26 years ago).  All the things I've enjoyed my entire life!  Even writing this blog, this morning, knowing this is one of my playgrounds and Jesus is hanging with me on that playground! 

We grow and change.  We learn new things.  We age and can no longer do some of the things we used to, but our playground consistently changes and Jesus is even more excited than we are, that He gets to hang out with us!!  To really be aware of His presence and the enjoyment He and I get, together!  There are times throughout my day that I'm on autopilot!  I'm no more aware of His presence than the Man in the Moon!  Yet, to pause and really get an understanding that He's there - with us, enjoying our life moments!  Just meditate on that for a minute.  Think about your "playgrounds!"  Everytime your heart comes alive to something - be it serving someone, using one of your gifts or talents, loving someone, spending time with a friend, drinking an amazing cup of coffee and writing a blog (like I am right now).  Wow....it just keeps exploding in my heart!! 

I am someone who really enjoys my "alone" time.  I love peace and quiet.  I enjoy being with myself I guess you could say!  I enjoy me!  Well, Jesus knows I love that time and so there are many times He doesn't speak until I initiate the conversation.  I can just see Him sitting next to me, quietly, yet squirming in His chair, just waiting expectantly for my first word!  I think of the many times, I haven't spoken the first word and just go on about my day as if He doesn't exist.  Let's be real people!  I can see Him being disappointed that He didn't get to spend time with me!  Then I think about the times I've made it a "religious" practice and really don't get the full benefit of just hanging with Him.  At times it almost can become like a to do list and that is so not how God wants His time with us to be.  But what if, just what if we went about doing the things we loved, and lived with the constant awareness that Jesus is right along side of us, doing it with us and loving the time He gets to spend with us? 

What about the times you don't want to go to the playground?  Maybe you're dealing with a major loss in your life!  Maybe things are really tough right now financially, or emotionally for you and you just don't want to play.  I've been there several times in my life as well.  He'll hold you in the pain of life!  He's there to bring you through it.  He never leaves so just determine to live with an awareness that He's there!  There are times that I've felt a tangible presence.  A particular moment that I'll never forget was during a time in my life that my heart was just broken into pieces.  I was on a ladies retreat and I went back to my cabin and just began sobbing.  I literally felt Jesus crawl into bed with me, wrap His arms around me and I laid my head on His chest.  What's really crazy is I heard His heartbeat!  I didn't want to play on the playground, I needed something different in that season and God showed up in a personal, tangible way! 

I reflect once again on the book "Love Does" by Bob Goff.  There is a chapter entitled "Memorizing Jesus."  It begins with this quote..."I used to think I could learn about Jesus by studying Him, but now I know Jesus doesn't want stalkers."  He goes on to say later in that chapter these words...

"What I like about Jesus' message is that we don't need to study Him anymore to know Him.  That's what the religious people at the time were promoting.  Collecting information about someone is not the same as knowing a person.  Stalkers are ordinary people who study from afar the people they're too afraid to really know.  Jesus said that unless you know Him like a child you'll never really know Him at all.  Kids don't care about facts, and they certainly don't study each other.  They're just with each other; they do stuff together.  That's what Jesus had in mind."

Jesus is on your playground!  Your playground doesn't look like anyone else's playground!  So, go enjoy your time with Jesus...in a new way, on YOUR playground!! 



Hangin' with Jesus On My Playground,

TDahl

Liberated from Fear

I'm beginning to believe that I can almost call myself an expert in the area of life transitions, yet, I'm finding that I have so much to learn still...sigh!  For myself, and my particular personality bent, it is very difficult for me to let go of things in my life, to embrace the new things God is calling me toward.  I will rationalize and make excuses, even for others, to stay in my organized and structured world....because of fear!  About a year ago, God confronted me about an area I was walking in fear in, and had been nearly all my life!  He said plain and simple, "Tammy, you'll never accomplish what I've called you to do if you keep holding yourself back."  UGH....I so did not want to hear that!  He began to take me on a journey that was really painful to confront!  Really painful!!   

 

I compare it to my relationship with the ocean.  We have a love hate relationship actually.  I find it beautiful to look at as well as listen to.  I'll even step out and get my toes wet, then maybe I'll go ankle deep, but no deeper than the knees, because this girl wants to see the bottom and everything around me!  It's quite humorous actually.  God created me and I think He laughs as He watches my baby steps.  God knows however, what it takes for me to make serious life changing decisions and so, He begins to stir in my heart, what I refer to as, "divine discontent."  He's given me this gift, that sometimes I call a curse; and that is the gift of being unable to ignore my heart!  That makes for a very painful journey at times, but it also yields the fruit of an authentic life journey.  See, God wants to take us to the deep waters!  The unknown! 

 

When life transition moves into your world, and in my case, from all angles - family, church, work, you find out quickly what God has equipped you with on the inside!  You also find out the areas of your heart that are led by fear and which areas are led by faith!  And, finally, when you choose to take action, you find out who is really standing WITH you.  It can be very painful, but it is also very rewarding!  It's a double edged sword really.  I'm reminded of a sermon TD Jakes preached entitled, "Comrades, Confidants, and Constituents."  YouTube it, take notes, and save it in your favorites to revisit often!  My dear friend Mandy and I had a recent conversation about this sermon; can I just say I love that girl!  I've been struggling with engaging in a particular arena for quite some time.  She confronted me about it around the same time God did (imagine that).  Well, recently when I made a huge life decision, and began embracing what God has built me to do on a whole other level, she came to me, looked me in the eye, held my hand, and said, "Tammy, I am with you!  You don't have to worry about stepping on my toes, or holding yourself back, because I am with YOU!"  I can't tell you what that did to my heart, it's absolutely unexplainable in words.  She knows me well enough to know that I will hold myself back, to accommodate another. 

 

I'm one of those people that tries to take into account every person's heart.  I almost have to be forced to take my own heart into account.  Some may call that a weakness, I however would like to refer to it as a strength (I think I'm in denial - LOL).  In all seriousness though, I would like to refer to it as compassion.  Compassion is definitely something this heart of mine is equipped with because of my life experiences.  The bible refers to it as "one who is forgiven much, loves much!"  This girl has been forgiven of much throughout this life.  I think there is a point though that this characteristic can become a crutch because I can't solve another person's insecurities.  Only God is equipped for that job!  I've recently discovered that many times throughout my journey in life, I will hide my lamp under a bushel so to speak, so that another won't feel insecure or intimidated...and people that is just not healthy!!!  Well, God is setting me free from that!  I'm a work in progress and I have 3 best friends that are stuck to me like glue holding me accountable when they see me begin to do that!  I'm doing heart work in this area, and I've seen this particular characteristic in my life since I was a little girl!  I haven't wanted to look at it for what it really is, but I'm facing it head on!  What I won't become, is arrogant, because God's gifted me with a compassion that will never go away!  You don't forget the kind of roads I've traveled and you sure don't forget those who God sent along the way to mine the treasures in you!   

So I leave you with this thought - one that has resonated with me for years, but now has come alive in my heart, like a fire!!!  It's a quote by Marianne Williamson: 

 

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.  Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.  It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.  We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?"  Actually, who are you not to be?  You are a child of God.  Your playing small does not serve the world.  There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.  We are all meant to shine, as children do.  We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.  It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.  As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

 

Now go and shine bright - free from fear!!

TDahl

Into Me See = Intimacy

The last week has been an emotional whirlwind for me, for so many reasons!  The number one reason was the news I received about my friend Darin Hufford who is literally fighting for his life as I write this blog this morning. 

When I connected with Darin several years ago, it was through my ministry Out of Exile.  He had heard my story and if I remember correctly he reached out to me.  We talked on the phone several times and I remember thinking to myself, is this guy for real?  Something was different about him than from any other person I had talked to or connected with my entire life.  Throughout our conversations we would joke about things, laugh about stupid stuff, talk on levels that were so deeply engaging that it literally would freak me out!  I was so guarded at that time when it came to men in general because of the intense hurt I had come from, but it was like this guy could read my heart and calm my fears in an instant. 

He then sent me his book - "The God's Honest Truth."  When I read that book, I experienced so many moments of freedom in my heart regarding my relationship with God.  It was crazy good!  The book has been retitled to "The Mis-Understood God" and I would encourage you to pick up a copy!  Soon after we had begun conversing via the phone, he had a speaking engagement in Florida.  I invited him to stay here at my house while he was in town.  Seeing as my mom and I reside together, it was appropriate to offer my home.  When he arrived, I picked him up at the airport, and we stopped at a restaurant to eat dinner.  We just chatted as usual.  My mind was racing in all these different directions (you know when you're trying to pay attention, but your mind is just evaluating someone, taking them in, questioning things, etc.) and I kept telling myself to FOCUS!  There was just this presence about him unlike anything I had ever experienced before.  He was engaged in conversation and made me feel like I was worth listening to, I guess you could say.  Have you ever talked to someone and you're sharing your heart and then they just kinda glaze over mid-conversation and you feel like, excuse me, I'm talking, listen to me, I'm opening my heart to you and sharing something?  With Darin, I assure you that you will NEVER get that kind of response.  He is so engaged and so interested that you almost feel uncomfortable.  It's like you feel your heart has been stripped down to the raw and its just out there, vulnerable, for the world to see!  You can't help it!  You can't stop it!  You have no control over that - and can I tell you its freaking scary!  In my case, terrifying! During that time with him though, I was forced to confront my demons of having a rejection based mindset and share with him....AFRAID!  Listen, Darin doesn't do casual when it comes to relationships!!  

Darin and Angie Hufford



This morning as I sit here, I am so thankful for his amazing wife!  I would think that most women would struggle having their husband travel to another state, stay in the home of a woman she's never met and totally be ok with that!  One day, if marriage is part of God's plan for me, I so want to be that kind of woman!!!  A woman willing to do what it takes for her man to accomplish his mission in Christ!  Angie, even though I've never met you - you've inspired me from day one!  Darin was used as an instrument of God to touch my life with something new - its called intimacy - INTO ME SEE!  Another friend of mine, Gene McConnell, describes intimacy using that description and it is so incredibly appropriate!  Because of Darin's example and of course his heart for God, his willingness to take my heart on an authentic journey to my God, it literally opened up the path for me to be intimate with God!  My life was changed because God connected me with him!  I continue the journey and now I freak people out because I want to know them deeply, and I care authentically!  There is nothing like intimacy with God that overflows into having intimacy with others! 

 - INTO ME SEE -

Darin and Angie, I love you!  

TDahl 

Dare to Dream

I had to share this because I just get so excited at the possibilities in life!  For so many years I was afraid to dream.  I was afraid to get my hopes up for them to just be dashed again and again.  For years the scripture in Proverbs that says "Hope deferred maketh the heart sick," was my life mantra!  It wasn't until I really looked at that fear head on and decided to deal with it, that I truly realized change was imminent!   So for nearly 7 years now, I have been diligent in persuading my heart of not only God's promises, but also the proper placement of my hope in those promises! 

Proper placement of our hopes and dreams begin with partnering with God!  He should be our "hope / dream keeper!"  I used to place hope in things or people, however that is when my hopes and dreams had a negative impact in my heart, which continued a cyclic chaos, that brought forth an "I give up" result!  

When I finally got sick and tired of being sick and tired, I made a decision!  I said, God, my Bible says I was not designed to live this way, and although my experience has contradicted what Your Word tells me, I'm choosing to believe You, over me and God, you need to show me how to make this journey with You!  This brought on an extraordinary journey of doing things afraid and believing God that good would come from the brokenness of my heart!  There were a lot of broken places in there that needed God's redemption and restoration!  As God and I have made the journey together, and I've invested His word in my heart, and talked with Him about my fears, and crying my eyes out more times than I can count, as well as surrounding myself with a plethura of leaders, teachers, mentors, etc., that can encourage me, I can say, my heart is well in this area now!  I want to keep it well so I keep investing in myself to not only maintain it, but to also expand my heart and dream bigger! 

Listen, God often leads us by the desires of our heart and the desires I have welled up in there, need my partner, God!  He is my hope keeper!  He is my dream keeper!  If you are depending on people to make your dream happen, change your way of thinking!  Depend on God to make it happen and He'll bring the right people to accomplish His dream for you!!!  You know when you follow God, it's His dream for your life!  Looks a little differently when you begin to see it that way, doesn't it? 

One of the dreams I believe God has for me is to travel!  I want to do huge concerts and have inspiring conferences that infuse people with possibility!  I want them to dare to dream and dare to hope, but trusting in the right ONE to make the dreams and hopes possible!  Not everyone will understand why you dream what you dream!  The right people will however!

The other night I was outside in parking lot of the church I attend.  My pastor had just taught and in his teaching he shared about a pastor in South Africa believing God for a larger home.  At the time he lived with his wife and child in a tiny 1 bedroom apartment.  When people would come over he would say "this is my master suite, this is the guest bedroom, this is my office, etc."  He literally would just be turning around in one place, pointing at areas in this tiny apartment. A few years later, someone built this huge home for him and his family!  So as my friend Michele and I were talking about this, I pointed to the parking lot and said, "Michele, look at my huge tour bus!  It's everything I wanted.  It's black with big silver swirls (I love black and silver) and shiny wheels.  The master suite is mine, but there are plenty of bunks for all of us.  We can all switch the master suite every week so we all can enjoy it!  Oh, you'll have to deal with my dogs too.  The dogs go with me on the road!  See the big TDahl written on the side there?  Well, Michele, let's get on the bus, its time to ride!"  Just as I finished speaking that, no joke, a big tour bus that was black with silver swirls passes right by the church!  I flipped out and started jumping up and down and screaming with this hope that exploded in my heart!!  The bus missed its stop because it didn't turn around and pick us up, but hey, the fact is, I saw a glimpse of the dream and it made my heart soar with excitement!!! 

So can I just encourage you to get on board with God and dream big!!!  HOPE HUGE!!!  The possibilities are limitless with God!!!

TDahl

Leading By Example

I will preface this blog with a sincere thank you to those who speak into my life!  Your leadership and guidance has been and continues to be priceless in my life. 

Those who know me pretty well, know that leadership is something I study, read about, attend workshops on, etc., because God created me to be a leader.  Hindsight is 20/20 and I can honestly say that I was born a leader!  I didn't recognize that as a young girl.  I just knew that somehow I influenced others in both good and bad ways.  As a teenager, my friend's parents even recognized that my influence was very strong and tried to keep their children away from me at times.  Lets just say I was not the most compliant individual when it came to authority!  I was never afraid to stand alone when I was standing up for something that was right.  Guess what?  That still hasn't changed, when it comes to standing up for something that is right!   

When I re-committed my life to Jesus on August 17th, 1994 I began learning about godly leadership through the guidance of Dad and Mom Heisey.  I lived with them during my pregnancy and until Mikayla was about 6 months old.  Dad was the leader of their home and he exhibited a godly example in both love and truth!  He was not afraid to confront things, yet he still made you feel loved in the process.  I remember watching Dad study his Bible every morning for a few hours before his day started.  I would sometimes sleep in his office (there was a bed in there) just so I could wake up to the light that was on his desk shining to illuminate his Bible and notebook.  I watched him intently.  He knew I would wake up at about 5:00 (even though I had been awake watching him for about an hour and he didn't know it), so about 5 minutes before, he would stop his studying and go to the kitchen and make me a cup of coffee.  He would set it next to the bed and go back to his studying.  I would awake (lol) and sit and drink my coffee and talk with him about what he was studying.  Can I just say his influence with actions was, and still is, so powerful in my life.  Dad's leadership, coupled with his servant's heart has influenced my life so much!

I began to study leadership.  I even completed a 2 year internship with my former pastor and then was formally ordained as a minister in 1998.  I was in leadership at my church and served them for 6 out of the 8 years I attended there.  I started a non-profit ministry and began to minister to women in the adult entertainment industry.  I preached on Monday nights at my church for a period of time as well.  It was in my heart to lead people.  I didn't just want to lead people, I wanted to be an effective leader!  That meant living what I was learning, and for sure living what I was teaching!!  I'm far from perfect, and I make a lot of mistakes - however I have set strong boundaries for myself and I continue to evaluate those boundaries as I learn more and more about leading people.  

Recently, I had a conversation with a few individuals and I was livid as to what they were sharing with me regarding leadership issues.  I had to really watch my tongue and harness it with great care.  I've been meditating on the things they've shared and thus prompted my blog. 

I think there is a deception that is running rampant within the body of Christ.  The body of Christ is beginning to look like the world!  They have tried to fit in to draw people, rather than stand out and have people say "I want what you have."  If you say anything, then you are accused of being judgmental.  I accept people as they are, but I can tell you, they would not be placed in a position of leadership if there wasn't a higher standard operating in their personal lives.  If someone in a position of leadership has a failure, then they should be removed so they can be restored.  It's setting a boundary, and placing that person's healing above everything else, as well as protecting those they are influencing!  It's addressing issues head on, as uncomfortable as that may be - it's the responsible thing to do!

There were many conversations I had with Dad Heisey over the course of my time in his home.  There were conversations of correction, advice, affirmation, physical hugs and I love you's!  There were times he stood up to protect me when others had differing opinions.  There were times he sat me down and declared boundaries in his home!  His leadership was and still is priceless in my life!!  It's the reason I choose the mentors I do, in my own life! 

Let me tell you first hand - I DO NOT HAVE "YES" PEOPLE IN MY LIFE!  The people I've chosen to surround myself with and given them the authority to speak into my life, are those who are not afraid to communicate the truth with me and be completely authentic in that communication.  The people in my life do not have to walk on eggshells with me!  I feel this is very important for growth - both personally as well as in leading others!

There is another area in which I feel is incredibly important!  Making big decisions!  Decisions affect others!  When you have decisions to make that have the potential to impact a great deal of people, I follow the advice I received from a very wise man.  He said, "Tammy, whether you're married, or running a business, follow this rule of thumb...if you have to make a high impact decision, consult with others who have, A. made the decision in the past and can advise you of the high's and low's, and B.  No matter what, don't make the decision until your spouse, or board, or core (whatever you want to call them) are totally on board and in agreement - with absolutely no arm twisting or persuasion from you."  Can I tell you that piece of advice has saved me from making so many bad decisions.  I can also tell you that I've ignored that advice and have had to reap consequences of those decisions and it hasn't been fun!

Leadership is a responsibility I feel many don't take seriously enough.  That's my personal opinion of course.  There are so many areas in which, I personally want to become a better leader!  I will continue to study, grow, and learn in this area!  I will continue to lead by example and hopefully influence others to do the same!  When I fail, I know I've surrounded myself with wise, experienced individuals that will stretch out their hand to help me up, brush off the dust, and help me begin again - a wiser, more experienced individual myself!

TDahl



The Sarah's

The Sarah's...What Does that Mean?

So here's the story...About 3 1/2 years ago now, I read about an audition for a lead singer for a band that was forming.  I called the number and reached Michele Troesch (Drummer).  I had absolutely no idea this phone call would change my life, in so many ways. 

I had just re-embraced music.  Something I had run from for so many years.  My journey has not been easy at all.  I always knew that I had this gift, but nothing ever prepared me for the times it would leave me alone and rejected.  I've been singing since I was like 5 years old and when you're a small kid, people embrace you and say things like "awww that's so sweet," or "aren't you just precious."  However, when you reach the adolescent years people become cruel and mean.  I remember trying out for a solo back in 7th grade.  I can't remember the name of the song, but here are a few lyrics I remember..."The lone wild bird in lofty flight."  I can't tell you how true that lyrical line has been for my life.  I didn't get the solo part that day, but the girl who did, sure rubbed it in my face and had an ego as big as Texas (probably bigger).  It seems that I've been around people with huge ego's my entire life and it truly nauseates me to be honest.  Can I just say that those with huge EGO's are usually the most insecure people I've ever known!  Ego is false confidence and it tries to make others feel small and insignificant!  That breaks my heart, because we are all significant in God's kingdom and no one should make anyone feel less than, so they can feel better about themselves for a moment! 

There are so many stories I could tell you in my musical journey, but one thing I'm thankful for, looking back now, is I feel life has taught me an attitude of gratitude!  Because of my own personal journey and the things I've gone through, the rejection I've experienced, the mistakes I've made throughout life, I feel God has given me a passion for people! Especially those that are cast off and rejected!  Those one's are the treasures and I'm a treasure seeker for Christ!  

So back to my phone call with Michele.  We set up an audition time and I can say I was a bundle of nerves.  So I show up and the piece I had prepared was "Shadows of the Night" by Pat Benatar.  I love that song and I can nail the vocals comfortably, even when I'm nervous. There were also a few others there that wanted to jam with their guitars.  Can I just tell you that I knew I had a connection with Michele when we saw the "EGO's" in that room.  It was like each guitar player was trying to outshine the other one.  It was crazy!  We just kind of looked over at each other with this expression on our faces that were screaming..."REALLY??"  It was hilarious, but sad at the same time. It turned both of our stomachs!! 

Michele and I kept in touch periodically over the next 2 years.  We connected again when her son, Cody, competed at the fair.  So we got to catch up a little bit.  Then one day, Cody shows up to worship practice at the church I attend, to play drums for us.  I was like...what?  That ignited the journey.  Soon after that, I was asked to start leading worship on Wednesday nights.  I really wanted a drummer, so I called Michele and asked her to play for me.  She agreed!  I was so excited!!  Throughout this last year and a half now, we've built such a solid friendship.  We've gotten to know each other's hearts and have been able to serve together in various venues!  It's been amazing!!  Her son, Cody is like the son I never had.  He writes amazing music!  He wrote the music for "Beyond My Limits" (my title track on my debut worship album) and we co-wrote the lyrics together.  We've just got an amazing connection personally and in Christ!!  He's just the real deal!!

Over the past year, Michele has been working hard at building The Sarah's.  We've met some amazing people and our band members thus far, are off the chain amazing!  We're still looking for a female lead guitarist and a rythym guitarist, but we know the right people will enter the picture soon.  We want the right fit!  We want the God fit!!

The Sarah's...What does that mean?  Well, if you look at Sarah in the Bible, her dream came to pass in the latter years of her life.  She had a promise from God for years!  She even tried to make the promise happen in her own flesh and it made a mess of things!  However, the promise from God came to pass with the birth of Isaac.  With that said, we are just some God's girls with age ranges of 30's, 40's, and 50's, that have some pretty amazing and crazy life experiences.  Music has always been our dream and we are fully embracing the God gifts within us, and we will touch the world!  We will share our unique stories!  We will inspire others to live full out for God!  We will encourage others to embrace their mistakes in life and watch God make something beautiful out of the mess! 

We're "The Sarah's" and we are making our mark for the Kingdom of God! 

In His Grip, Grace, and AMAZING Strength,

TDahl

Lead Vocalist

The Sarahs
http://www.thesarahs.com/
http://www.tammydahl.com/

I Have a Path Just For You to Travel

Excerpt from my 31 Day Devotional - What Did He Say About Me?

“I Have a Path Just For You to Travel”

Daily Scripture

Psalm 16:11 AMP

You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.

Daily Devotion

The promise here is that He will show us “the” path of life. Not just “a” path of life. No, this scripture is specific in saying “the” path of life. Maybe you feel like you don’t have a purpose. Maybe you feel like you don’t matter. God created each and every one of us for His pleasure. He delights in us! He created us to love and serve us! Yes, you read that statement correctly. He wants to serve you!!

Jesus said that He did only what He saw the Father do and Jesus served those around Him. Jesus cared so much for other’s that He literally laid down His very own life to change the very course of history. God promises to show us “the” path of life.

What do you think of when you hear the word “life”? Maybe life has not been so good to you and thus far you’ve experienced just “a” path and not “the” path. Maybe you’ve been hurt deeply and life has not treated you kindly.

In our daily scripture, the Psalmist David trusted that God would show him “the” path of life – he continued with saying that In His presence IS fullness of joy. There is a connection here. “The” path of life is shown to us when we are in His presence.

Think of a time when you have had the most fun. Go ahead, picture it and envision it in your mind. Ok, think about everything you experienced that day. You may be laughing right now just pulling up that memory in the filing cabinet of your mind. Now compare that time and times it by infinity and that is what you will experience in God’s presence. He promises that there is FULLNESS of JOY! His path of life will bring you Joy, but for Him to show us “the” path, we must be in His presence. God’s path of life will bring you out of any despair as you travel with Him. God’s path for you is for you, and not anyone else. That is why it is so important to experience His presence and get to know Him intimately. His path for you has purpose and destiny.

It’s so easy to get wrapped up and compare yourself to someone else’s path and think that you are behind in life. It’s also easy to get wrapped up in thinking you are so much further ahead than someone else and you get proud and boastful about it. Yet, when we do that, we are not really allowing God to direct our path. When we allow God to lead us down His path, we are also learning God’s ways as He is teaching us along the way. We don’t need to get in the trap of comparing ourselves with anyone else. God has chosen the path for you and no one else. God has put specific talents and strengths in you for the path He has chosen for you. It may appear that someone else has the same talents and they are doing the same thing, but I can assure you that God doesn’t duplicate you! There is no one else like you and there never will be.

TDahl

A Letter to My Mom

I read such an amazing article a few weeks ago "10 Things I Would Say to My Mother....if she were still alive."  As I read those personal things that the author shared, tears began to well up in my eyes and started slowly streaming down my face along with the emotion of "I have got to do this....while my mom is alive!"  So this is what I wrote to her.  I hope it may inspire those of you who are still blessed to have your mother living, to share too!

So here goes...

(not in any particular order)                      

1.  Mom, remember that time we just took off in someone else's car you borrowed because you were afraid ours wouldn't make the road trip?  We didn't know where we were headed but we ended up in Wisconsin Dells.  You paid for us to go to the water park and I said I didn't have a bathing suit....you said "oh, you only live once....slide down this water slide in your jeans and t-shirt!"  I froze my butt off all the way home, but that memory is the flippin' best ever!  Thank you for the adventure!!!

2.  I loved getting up with you super early when you owned the restaurant.  I know we laugh about this all the time, but I loved super huge pancakes.  You would always let me cook it on the grill, but this one time I poured so much batter on the grill that it was HUGE!  If my pancakes got too dark I wouldn't eat them so I ran back to the kitchen and said "Mom, Mom....come flip my pancake!"  You were running to the grill and you flipped that huge thing like a pro!  You were my hero then and you are my hero now!!!

3.  The trip to Minneapolis to see my Grandma Dahl and we found out she had passed away....you did everything you could to be sure I at least reconnected with my Dad.  We went to "Denny's" and you and my dad had a great time together and I got to spend time with him which made me feel so amazing.  I love that you never said anything bad about my dad and always protected that "Prince" image I had in my heart for him...even though he wasn't part of my life.  I loved our road trips together!! 

4.  Our Dukes of Hazzard clunker of a car!  It was so embarrassing to climb out of that dumb car window in the dead of winter because the doors wouldn't work.  The exhaust fumes almost made us pass out it was so bad....but shoot, looking back we had some pretty hilarious laughs over that car!!  Vroom Vroom piece of junk!  You always made everything positive, even though I now understand because of life in general, how hard that must have been for you.  Thank you for always being so incredibly optimistic.  I love that about you.....

5.  Your endless advice!!!  Oh how I love to talk with you about anything and get your input.  You've always loved me unconditionally.  You tell it to me straight up!  Sometimes your candidness frustrates me, especially when you see something I refuse to look at.  Yet, this is the essence of who you are!  You don't sugar coat things in life and I love that about you.  You have a protective eye and watch out for me. 

6.  Your investment in cultivating my gift!  My voice!  From the time I was a little kid through today, you constantly invest in this voice of mine!  I remember at about the age of 7, we went on our yearly family vacation to Camp Chetek.  They asked me to sing for the service one evening.  I went up to that big pulpit that swallowed me whole, and the pastor moved his chair up to the podium so I could stand on that!  I remember climbing that chair and looking out to a crowd of about about 800 to 1000 people.  I delivered my song and you were just smiling ear to ear!!  Now in my adult years, leading worship on certain occasions, I still look for you in that front row...smiling ear to ear!!!   Speaking of music....I'll never ever forget the time you sang in church (you sang a lot) the most beautiful rendition of the song "Ten Thousand Angels."  Wow!!!  Blew me away as a little girl watching my Mommy sing!!   I wish I had that recorded!!! 

7.   I loved how you encouraged my love for animals.  I would rescue anything I could...still do!  You taught me responsibility by giving me responsibility of a living thing that depended on my care if it was going to survive.  It wasn't an option.  I love you so much for that!  That teaching has given me a tenacity in life to take care of what needs to be taken care of along with a loyalty and committment that few possess today!  Thank you!!!

8.   People that know you, love you!!!  You have always been the rock in our family and in my friendships I've shared throughout my life.  My friends would always come to you for life advice because you would share your mistakes and be so open and real with them.  My close friends still come to you!  For many of my friends that have lost their mom's, you've become a 2nd mom!  You are an amazing woman that has soooo much to offer! 

9.  You, my precious mother, love much!!  You believe in people!!  You can look at the worst mess someone has made of their lives and see potential where others just walk away!!  You've taught me to stick with the underdog by your example!  You've shown me that when you believe in someone, GREAT MIRACLES happen!  You've taught me to stand with the ones who have been rejected and cast off!!  I've been this way since I was a little girl...whether it was some kid picking on another kid that couldn't stand up for themselves or the church I grew up in was calling people out on their "sin" from the pulpit!  I wouldn't stand for it then and I won't stand for it now!  Thank you for showing me by action what love can do!!!  I've seen so many people throughout the years, that you've invested your life in, get turned around and become a success.  Your love always pointed them to Jesus!!! 

10.  There are a bazillion more things I can think of that I could tell you and I know I have throughout the years, but I'll close with this....Thank you for always believing in me no matter what!  When I haven't believed in myself, you have believed!  You've put your money where your mouth is soooo many times.  Spending your last dollar for me to audition for "Kids for Wisconsin" and even though I didn't make it (they sure wanted me to and even gave me a second chance...I just couldn't get that dance down..ugh), to literally investing thousands of dollars in this last CD project!  You are with me all the way!!!  I cannot tell you how amazing it was to have you there, in the studio in Nashville, supporting me and encouraging me and praying for me!!!  Then to invest in my friend Mandy as well.....YOU BELIEVED IN US!!!  YOU GAVE US WINGS TO FLY!!!  Throughout my entire life you've invested in the lives of others, helping them to cultivate their gift of music!  I follow in your footsteps!!  Mom, you truly are the most amazing woman!!!  I'm honored to call you Mother!!!  I love you.......I love sharing life with you....and I hope we have many more years to travel this road called life...TOGETHER!!!

With all my love,

Tammy

Live, Love, and Praise Loud

I've come to a place in my life that I've determined this next half of life, will be my best half!  I've summed up this next half with these 5 words...."Live, Love, and Praise Loud!" 

The biggest part of charting a course for your life is to KNOW yourself!  Know your inner core and basically inner character.  It's discovering who you really are, what you like, what you dislike, what your passionate about, what your not, and then choosing to live out of that character, full throttle! 

God fashioned me with certain characteristic qualities when He created me.  I believe I spent the first 30 years of my life both fighting those qualities as well as figuring out those qualities.  Surprise!  By the time I hit my mid-30's I started becoming quite comfortable with me.  They say that's when it begins to happen.  By my late-30's, I began to fully embrace myself as a whole...flaws and all!  So, here I am, nearing 41 years old and feel that I've got the foundation built in my life that I can now start building on!  So, this is just a blog about a few things I've learned in getting to this stage, which I might add is absolutely AMAZING!  I also want to encourage those in the journey called LIFE, thus my purpose for sharing!

What's it take to "Live" the life you desire....

A decision to live your authentic self!  It's simple really!  I made it so complicated the first half of my life.  Wow!  I do believe you have to take a journey of self-discovery...alone in my case!  I see so many people that are literally afraid to be alone.  I've been there...believe me.  They bounce from one relationship to another and think they've found the be all and end all in the arms of someone.  Meanwhile, they never take the time to discover who they really are by embracing every part of themselves...pain, hurt, victories, failures, successes, emotional baggage, relationship residue, like, dislikes, and on and on the story goes.  I can say to live the life you desire....you must take a journey of self discovery and not be afraid to be your authentic self...unashamed!

Love.....

Many people ask me, "Tammy, how are you so content being single?"  Well first, let me just tell you, that contentment was NOT an easy journey of discovery.  NOT AT ALL!  However, I can say it was completely worth it!  You see, in my youth, I didn't go without a relationship of some kind from the time I was like 10...I'm not joking at all!  I gave myself away over and over again from the time I was 13 until I was 23 years old, to receive what I refer to as false validation!  I depended on a guy to validate my worth!  Unfortunately, I did it in all the wrong ways and ended up feeling worthLESS!!  So, when I got pregnant with my daughter at the age of 23, I had some super, super, hard decisions to make.  One of the decisions would include not having a revolving door of men coming in and out of my life!  After I had my daughter Mikayla, in 1995, that decision was more difficult than I had anticipated because life as a single mom was emotionally and physically taxing.  I desired an emotional fix!!!  I, however, got a grip early on and said, nope, I'm not living with a revolving door!  So, I ultimately chose the single life.  For nearly 10 years I would pine inside of myself desiring a man's love....it was so, so, so, difficult.  I would cry and feel so unworthy and question why no one was looking my way, and feel that something was wrong with me.  Throughout those painful years, I chose to find my worth and value in the One who created me...God!  I studied His character, His immense love for me, and grew to love Him deeply, which in turn has led me to the place of complete contentment being single!  In fact, I absolutely LOVE my single life!  I'm free to do what I want, pursue goals I want, and create the life that I want!  The first half of my life, I overgave to other's to try and satisfy a deep hole in my soul.  I don't do that anymore!  So, do I see myself single forever?....I have no idea.  I can tell you I have absolutely no desire whatsoever at this stage in my life to be in a relationship.  That may change, but its completely ok with me if it doesn't.  So I've surrounded myself with amazing, authentic friendships, and experience love on a completely different level.

Praise Loud.....

Listen, one thing I've found in life is that you've gotta look for the good things!  We all have junk!  We all have issues and life circumstances that can knock us down, but let me tell you, there is always, always, always, something GOOD to find!  Always!  Years ago a pastor told me, "Tammy, if you can't find something good in your life, go out and find someone who is in a worse position than you are, serve them, and you'll find you'll become thankful real quick!  That advice has carried me through the toughest of times - and I can tell you I followed it!  To me praising loud is just letting your thankfulness drown out your sorrows!  Your attitude of gratitude can become the loudest voice in your life...if you choose!

So...this next half of life...choose to "Live, Love, and Praise Loud!"

Be encouraged.....You can have the life you desire!!!

TDahl