Have you ever heard someone say to never give your power away? Well, I want to talk about something that is directly linked to your personal power and that my friend's is your personal truth! You may be asking, what is "personal truth?" Here's the TDahl version of the answer....
Let's just quickly review Proverbs 4:23 - Above all else guard your heart, for out of if flow the issues of life.
Guarding your heart is a great ideology, however I feel many are going about it the wrong way. How do I know that? I'll give you three guesses and the first two don't count! Ha! For years I basically used that scripture to keep the walls surrounding my heart in tact to avoid hurt and pain. I used the scripture to justify my choice! And yes, it was MY choice! Well throughout the years, those walls got really tiring to be honest. I'm one who wants to live from my heart and fully experience life! The hard knocks, the victories, the euphoria that comes with adventure! In other words, I want to live full out. Well, newsflash, you cannot live full out standing behind the great wall of China, metaphorically speaking.
So, over the course of the last 3 years, I've been writing my personal truth! The reason is, that if you are aware of your personal truth, and refuse to compromise your truths, then you will always keep your personal power in tact! Wow, can I just say it has saved my hide!!!
Let's look at an example of personal truth. Now, keep in mind, your personal truth, is just that, YOURS! A personal truth is simply something you will or will not put up with - period. There are some things that I won't put up with, that maybe you will - that's called individuality. It's not a right or wrong thing, its a YOU thing! I'll give you an example of a few of my personal truths.
"I will honor myself! I will exit any situation or relationship that brings dishonor to me, or those closest to me."
" I will protect those closest to me by first loving myself and refusing to compromise who I am, and who I was created to be, and therefore, those who maintain a relationship with me - be it family, friends, or my significant other, will find they receive positive, life giving, affirming love from me."
"In a relationship, I will honor my significant other by respecting his place in my life, and I will never put myself in a situation that would cause him to question my relational integrity, faithfulness, and loyalty to him."
See when you have personal truths written for your life in every area, it is easy to identify something, or someone, attempting to overstep the boundaries you've set in place for your life. At times, it may even be ourselves violating those boundaries. However, you can get yourself back on track quickly by revisiting your personal truths often and even re-writing them from time to time to gain even deeper clarity.
For many years of my life I had absolutely no boundaries. After committing my life to Christ in 1994, this was the number one area I had to work on. It's hard work!
Personal truths when identified, lived by, and never compromised will save you from tons of pain! Since I'm an open book, I'll give you an example from my own life. Now, when you read my little story, I want to say that in no way am I bashing anyone! It's just a prime example of everyone living by different personal truths. Some people base their truths on what the world finds acceptable, others, like myself, base my personal truths on what God says will bring me life. If I want all that God has for me, then I need to do things His way! Otherwise, I'm going to miss the mark and live in regret.
So here's my story...I'm a girl who really loves to have fun! I love people and social functions, I love to dance, and I love music, crazy whitewater rafting trips, etc. You get the point! I just love good clean fun! Key word - CLEAN! Sometime ago, I went to a few parties with a date, someone whom I thought was my friend, and whom I thought cared about me! Can I just say I felt I entered the twilight zone. Well, I think I actually did. I was so square peg, round hole! At the first party, I was introduced to someone that was very inappropriate with my date. In fact, her statement (cannot even repeat it) and body language/touching, were very "sexual" in nature towards him. I just stood there like, did that just really happen?! I was then left standing there because my date walked over to chit chat with this woman's husband, and then this woman just turned away from me and left me standing there. Awkward! When we left, I was still reeling from the whole inappropriate comment/touching episode. Years ago, that would have been nothing to me. Now, however, that's not the story I live by. This woman has no knowledge of what honor is! She dishonored me, my date, her own husband, and unfortunately herself within a matter of 1 minute! Yea, not ok! And clearly, my date/friend did not understand honor either, or he would have taken me out of there immediately or never brought me into that situation in the first place, especially knowing how I live my life!
The next stop we made, I met an amazing couple!!! They were celebrating 33 years of marriage and it was obvious why!!!! They honored each other, and clearly had Christ the center of their marriage! It was so refreshing to me as I was still reeling from the previous stop! I wanted to just stay there to be honest! LOL!!!
The final stop, was the final straw for me. What I witnessed at this party ripped my heart out. There were kids at this party and some of the parents have clearly had no filters in place with their children. A twelve year old, who just met me, said something very "sexually" inappropriate to me about someone else. My date, said nothing! He didn't say "son, you don't talk to a lady like that!" NOTHING! Then there was this horrible, horrible show on television and there was this little 5 year old girl sitting on her mom's lap, trying to figure out what she was seeing on TV. I couldn't handle it!!!! I left the room. It literally made me sick to my stomach. I literally felt I went back in time because that was the norm for me, twenty years ago. When I was raising my daughter, I protected her ear gates and her eye gates because I didn't want her to develop a belief system that was rooted and grounded in what the world deems acceptable, and I certainly wanted her beliefs about sexuality to be pure! I wrote God on her heart when I had the chance and protected her because that's what parents do! When they get to the age of accountability, it is their choice as to what they allow to influence their hearts, but at least I have a promise from God that if I raised her in His ways, she'll go back to those ways one day! I know I did!
So, in revisiting my personal truths that I've written on my heart, there were serious violations! I knew that was the end for me and my date knew it too, because he knows me and knows this girl doesn't play with her heart! Of course some horrible pot shots were taken at me. I was made fun of, and pieces of my past were joked about, and to be completely honest it hurt me deeply. It hurt because a man's heart is supposed to protect! Instead, he joined in the game. However its all good because the bottom line is that I love me, and I love the life God has given me, and I refuse to compromise! Hurting people hurt people and I understand that, so no hard feelings on my end! But you see, how by revisiting my personal truths, refusing to violate the boundaries I set in place for myself, did indeed save me from a ton of pain that "would" have been in my future had I continued on that path.
My personal truth is my personal power! I wrote my personal truths based on what God desires for my life. This requires an investment of time in the Word! Get to know God's heart for you, His desires for you, and then makes those desires your desires! His Word works hand in hand with the power of choice He has given you! Now, I could've have chosen to be completely be fake in that situation, compromise my personal truth, and you know what, I would have sold out! For what? A warm body (because that sure as heck isn't any kind of relationship I want)? Really??? Not in a million years!
In writing your personal truths, get away alone and think of the life you want to live, the kind of relationships you want to have in your life, and of course the kind of love you desire! Make a list! Then, become that list! Make it your personal truth as it will become your personal power, which will ultimately lead you to what you desire and keep you from distractions and the deception of the enemy! Don't give your personal power away for anything! If you find yourself justifying things, revisit that list! Refuse to compromise!
Want some help in discovering your personal truths for you? I'd be happy to help! Email me at info@tammydahl.com.
In His Grip, Grace, and Strength,
TDahl
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